Tue, 20 Sep 2005 22:08:23 GMT

Periods are designed to make a woman feel unattractive.

Water retention. Feeling excessively warm. Bad skin. Cravings for junk food. Tender breasts. Urgh, just a big white flobbery thing. Yeeuch.

I haven't *actually* started yet but god do I feel like the Stay-Puft man O.o

I am going to get Aqua-Ban tomorrow, I don't care how much it costs, I want to stop feeling like a small elephant has envaded my body.

Good GOD my cellulite is awful O.o

Am I just paranoid?

No, I'm female.

That said, went to the club last week. Wasn't too bad although there's an event on down here which means we have a LOT of tourists so the place was uncomfortably packed.
Made friends with one of the barmen at work, weirdly enough, we got chatting and then he brought in some free passes for me. Excellent.
Also got to know another new dancer but for the life of me I can't remember her name... anyway, she said come for an audition this week. Not likely now I'm a big white flobbery elephant from outer space body snatcher victim. AND I haven't got my scars seen to yet. As if I have time with work stressing me out at the moment.
If I squeeze my thigh it looks like rice pudding.
I hate rice pudding.
No wonder I asked Aiden to turn the lights off the other night.
Must. Go. Swimming.
Stupid hormones.

Mon, 15 Aug 2005 20:15:44 GMT

So. Aiden and I go to the club on Thursday night.
Francesca was there, as usual. We relented and let her give us a dance because, quite simply, its rude to say no. She's a nice girl, but so-very-not-our-type. But as I said, she's a nice girl and its rude to say no. Its Aiden's money anyway.
Mia comes over - I didn't know her by name until Thursday but we met last time. She thinks Aiden is my boyfriend which would be amusing if it wasn't dangerous. But then again, its easier to have her believe than put her right, because its - well.
Anyhow, that's not important.
The club is still gorgeous; its strange, the rules as to what is acceptable are left at the rather slick doors. There are women walking around in outfits that would be terribly sluttish in 'real life', but in the club it doesn't matter, they'll be taking them off. Mia came over before we moved nearer the stage; she remembered me and I was surprised. She said I had my own look ~ apparently "my boyfriend" could come in unnoticed but there's no-one else that looks like me, apparently. Last week one of the bar girls said to her (Mia) that there was a 'really pretty' girl sitting in the club and 'if she could look like anyone she'd look like her' - that's kind of strange but I don't think Mia was lying. Its a common misconception that these girls are super-catty, bitchy... whatever. In my experience they've all been lovely. And yes, I do know that's exactly how we make our money ;) But seriously, Mia said I shouldn't worry about growing my hair because there aren't any girls with short hair and my look is individual, it stands out and it works. Now apparently she does lessons but its over in another town. Not possible.
Aiden look a liking - well, Aiden and I took a liking to one of the dancers because she had extremely nice pants on - and then I got Mia to send her over to give me a dance. Aiden looked extremely annoyed for all of five seconds but I know he loves it.

When we moved over nearer the stage another client bought me a dance, the dancer wasn't really my choice but again, its very rude to say no. HeeHee.

There's a new treatment availiable for scars, although mine aren't bad, I'd like to have them sorted out and then I'd be able to wear stockings less often.
I. Must. Eat. Healthily.
I must must must.

Annnnyway... I've been thinking more about my outfits recently, I want to do some drawings, some designs. I want an underbust corset and some boots next month with the paycheck. I have to pay off my debts a bit more, but I'll get there.

I so need to tidy my room.
Ditto go swimming.

My skin isn't too hot at the moment. I need to make an appointment with my stylist. I think I might get my hair re-cut.

That WAS boring, wasn't it?

Lolita Deadhead